Can’t update your Xbox One via Xbox LIVE? Microsoft suggests taking it to a friend’s house

As we reported earlier, Microsoft has pulled the Xbox One's day-one update from its website, removing the option to manually install mandatory patch via USB. This means, to have a functional Xbox One at launch you must connect the console to the internet. It also means that those who can't connect their Xbox One to the internet are screwed — even if they managed to download the manual update via PC before it was pulled.

Over on the Xbox One support forums, user dysphunkti0n posted the following issue:

I won't have access to the internet for awhile starting in a few hours. I've already downloaded both updates and am confidant that I can use them without issue as I'm very good with technology. But now that they have been taken offline and MS says they will help us, I am confused. Can I still even use them? Was there an issue with those updates and using them can possibly brick my One? Who do I talk to to go about getting the update offline? I need to know ASAP.

And here's the response he got from a forum poster Mister Ohnaka, who is labeled as an official representative of Xbox Support.

"That is correct, we pulled the "Emergency Online Update'," Ohnaka said.

"For transparency, we have stated that the Xbox One will need an internet connection to install the 'Day One' update, so even if the emergency update were available, you would still need to connect your console to the internet to successfully install the full update and use the console," he explained.

And if you won't have connection available, "I would suggest taking your console to a friends house or something, and installing the update their."

Now there's a few things wrong with this, aside from Xbox Support's misuse of the word "there." First, why can't you update the console offline via USB? Second, this is 2013 — we have a freaking Kinect that can take commands — is taking the console to a friend's house really the best alternative Microsoft has for those who can't connect to the internet? 

It'd be one thing if he didn't already download the update via PC, but he did! Does Microsoft really have no way to update the Xbox One offline? 

I may be wrong, but I thought the whole reversal of a mandatory always-online console was to appease those with connection issues and to avoid problems like this.