Remember those good ole times when iRobot made those circular cleaning devices? The Roomba, even I admit, was harmless. It excelled at cleaning carpets, entertaining children, and scaring the shit out of animals; all the useful stuff. It creeped me out a bit how it knew how to ‘go home,’ but ultimately it was just there to clean. I’m okay with that… who likes to clean? Send the droid.
Then… iRobot and InTouch Health have to go and create something like this. The Remote Presence Virtual + Independent Telemedicine Assistant (RP-VITA) is a robotic doctor’s assistant. This is my personal nightmare and a giant leap towards the robot revolution. Not only can this thing move… but it can navigate through the halls of a hospital without bumping into objects or people – it knows. On top of that it can be fully controlled by an iPad.
This isn’t a joke. It has the ability to swap out different attachments for whatever the doctor needs; much like a robotic Mr. Potato Head. It can follow the doctor around and provide for him or her. Oh, and let’s not forget about Skynet, the RP-VITA has access to all of your medical records via the cloud so it knows more about you than you do.
That is about all that is known about this thing. The FDA has approved the RP-VITA but many of its features are still hidden from the public’s knowledge. I’m expecting chainsaw attachments or at least a single death ray. While sometimes ‘ignorance is bliss,’ I find it uncomfortable not knowing what this thing is capable of.
The face on the screen has a goatee. You know who has a goatee? Satan.
Historian, teacher, writer, gamer, cheat master, and tech guru: follow on Twitter @AndrewC_GZ
