Salty Dogs lose third North American Splatfest

Chalk up another first for the North American Splatfest: They finally got one right.

Team Marshmallow put those dirty wiener lovers in their place: Crying salty tears into their ink. If they put as much effort into winning as they did making excuses and attacking Team Marshmallow for being more popular, perhaps Team Hot Dog wouldn't look as bad as the unappealing meat product they chose to support.

It was obvious that Team Hot Dogs were in the minority, and they used that to their advantage. Almost all of Team Marshmallow's star players were tied up in Marshmallow vs. Marshmallow matches, which of course have no bearing on the Splatfest team rankings. This underhanded tactic let the weenies slink away with a higher win percentage.

Marie was the first of Team Hot Dog to get salty over the loss, but not the last.

Fortunately, their lucky break wasn't enough to overcome the revolting nature of the Hot Dog,which ultimately doomed Team Hot Dog to failure via popularity, or lack thereof. Under the new point calculations, 1% in win percentage is the equivalent of 4% in popularity. Since Team Marshmallow was more popular by 28%, Team Hot Dogs would have needed a higher win percentage by 7%.

Is a 7% difference in win percentage impossible? Not for a good team, but we might as well have called it impossible for Team Hot Dog. Oh wait, it was.