There’s nothing more charming than a neat little independent game that has charm and style… except for these lot. Disappointments would be understatements since some of them have killed potential sequels with their abysmal performances.
10. Rocket Knight
Publisher: Konami
Developer: Climax Studios
Release Date: May 12, 2010
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What is it with publishers thinking they can revive classics with tepid design decisions? Rocket Knight doesn’t live up to its name and only incites anger at how publishers are treating the XBLA service to bring back gems from our childhood to only ruin them.
9. Exit 2
Publisher: Taito
Developer: Taito
Release Date: February 23, 2009
If you want to fight with your controller and lose, then Exit 2 should be right up your alley. The original title was fantastic, but Exit 2 doesn’t do enough to warrant revisiting the series. The lack of excitement holds it back from ever earning its wings to fly.
8. Axel & Pixel
Publisher: 2K Play
Developer: Silver Wish Games
Release Date: October 14, 2009
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Axel & Pixel proves one thing: Games can have style and still be appalling. With no real substance behind it, Axel & Pixel is not challenging and has very little replay value.
7. Blacklight: Tango Down
Publisher: Ignition Entertainment
Developer: Zombie Studios
Release Date: July 7, 2010
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A generic first-person shooter that barely has any passable features to keep players sticking around for the multiplayer options. Considering the dated visuals and poor level design, it’s hard not to recommend avoiding Blacklight.
6. Shadow Assault: Tenchu
Publisher: From Software
Developer: From Software
Release Date: October 8, 2008
What a sad way for a series to go out. Shadow Assault: Tenchu should have been a nice bite-sized stealth title with a ninja as the lead. Now all that’s left are memories of how a series managed to fall from grace in a matter of no time.
5. Small Arms
Publisher: Microsoft Game Studios
Developer: Gastronaut Studios
Release Date: November 22, 2006
This could have been Microsoft’s answer to Nintendo’s Super Smash Bros. What it turned out to be was a fighter with little to no personality. Do you want to be put to sleep? Play a few sessions of Small Arms and you’ll be out in no time.
4. Tecmo Bowl Throwback
Publisher: Tecmo
Developer: Tecmo
Release Date: April 28, 2010
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Tecmo Bowl Throwback is another case of nostalgia getting the best of all of us. Here’s my best advice to starving gamers who want to relive their childhood: Let it go; it was never as good as you once thought. Limited in focus, this literally should have been thrown back into concept before release.
3. TMNT: Turtles in Time Re-Shelled
Publisher: Ubisoft Singapore
Developer: Ubisoft Singapore
Release Date: August 5, 2009
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What rubbish. As a slap to the face, the old soundtrack was removed in favor of modernized music. Add to the fact that the nostalgia has worn thin and button-mashing has made this a shallow experience. Yawn. When is the next 20-year-old video game going to be remade so I can grab some ibuprofen in advance?
2. Comic Jumper: The Adventures of Captain Smiley
Publisher: Microsoft Game Studios
Developer: Twisted Pixel Games
Release Date: October 6, 2010Read Full Review
Forget the humor or the lack thereof in comparison to past Twisted Pixel Games titles. Forget the manic gameplay that gets lost in translation between entertaining and aggravating. What needs to be focused on here is that Comic Jumper, the supposed evolution of Twisted Pixel Games, doesn’t deliver much of anything to starving fans who have been yearning for experiences in the same vein as ‘Splosion Man or The Maw.
1. Castlevania: Harmony of Despair
Publisher: Konami
Developer: Konami
Release Date: August 4, 2010
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What’s that you say? There’s a cooperative platformer within the Castlevania universe and it is exclusive to the Xbox Live Arcade? Where do I sign up? Wait a minute… you never told me it would be garbage piled on top of more garbage. Excruciating short, Harmony of Despair does nothing more than riddle the player with troubling menus and disorganized menus. What a shame. So much potential, so much waste.
