Along with the movie industry, video games are not immune to titles made from hastily thought-out nouns or from uncool publishing execs who are clueless to pop culture. A good title like Gears Of War or even Tomb Raider speaks volumes without the need to even look at the cover, and their successes have been measured on the franchise. There are, however, some Xbox 360 titles I am sure could have benefited from a little more thought.
50 Cent: Blood On The Sand Fiddy – to his friends and 50 Cent to you and me – goes off to the Middle East to recover a stolen skull encrusted with diamonds from terrorists. I kid you not. The story is lamentable and the title is even more ludicrous if you don’t know who 50 Cent is. You would think it was for the price of blood on sand, but then the cashier asks you for sixty dollars.
Peter Jackson’s King Kong: The Official Game Of The Movie The long title is there to make sure you don’t pick up any “unofficial” games as their quality may be inferior. If you ever played this game, the quality could not get any more inferior as both the graphics and gameplay were appalling. Did the publishers honestly think that there would be sub-par copies flooding the market and confusing buyers? If you ever do go out and buy this title, make sure you say the FULL name, just to be sure.
CSI: Hard Evidence Hard evidence? In all cases of this game, you find thin circumstantial evidence in under half an hour. There is even a case where the guy confesses at the end and all that evidence you gathered was a waste of time. A USB data stick, conveniently matching DNA and a threatening note are all laid out neatly in front of you. CSI: Easy To Find would have been far more accurate.
Hannah Montana: The Movie Forget the phenomena that is Hannah Montana and mountains of merchandise that discharges from that phenomena and let us just concentrate on the title here. Now if I were nine years old and I picked up this title and placed it my DVD player, I would be a pretty pissed nine year old. I would be expecting the movie as the title suggests instead of a woeful Xbox 360 game.
Raven Squad: Operation Hidden Dagger If you break it down, the title is actually five words strung together in broken English. Ravens are big thick-billed birds that make a lot of noise and found nowhere near jungles. So why would you want to name a elite stealth jungle force after them? The title sounds like a low-budget John Cena or Steven Seagal TV movie. Imagine being transferred to special forces and being asked the name of your last unit and mission. Go ahead say it out aloud in an Austrian accent like Arnold Schwarzenegger.
DiRT, GRID, Fuel The developers, Codemasters, seem to have a penchant for naming racing games with four letters and one syllable. Maybe they think the IQ of people who play racing games is limited and comprehending more than one syllable is asking too much. What can we expect next? RACE, FAST, GEAR, BOAT? I am sure there must be more and there are some definitely on the PS3. Please comment below with any other titles you feel that needed a little bit more thought and insight.
