Categories: Originals

Pokémon backstories are actually horrifying

After being initially leaked in magazine scans, a video went up showing off the new sandcastle Pokémon in action: Sandygast and its evolution Palossand, which is given life by a ghostly entity. Whilst sandcastles are usually a fun way for kids to spend time at the beach, you’d want to keep your children as far away from this Pokémon as possible. According to the official fact sheet of Palossand, it takes pleasure in acting like quicksand and consuming the life force of other Pokémon. It even includes a picture of Palossand straight up murdering Pikachu.

If you think it unusual for Pokémon to create mythos this dark, you clearly never watched the original movie. Or, you don’t pay attention to the Pokédex entries in the game. Compared to some Pokémon, Pollosand is a lightweight. Let’s take a look at pocket monsters that give this haunted sandcastle a run for its money.

Glalie

This Pokémon’s horrifying expression is matched by its horrifying eating habits. Not only will it freeze its opponents to death, but then it will casually munch on their frozen corpse. It doesn’t just immediately ravage the carcass; it’ll take its god damn time.

Gorebyss

Whilst you’d be forgiven for thinking this Pokémon delicate and non-threatening, it also bears a resemblance to that of a parasite. According to its Pokédex entry, Gorebyss will slip its own mouth into its prey’s and drains it of its bodily fluids. What a terrifying way to bite the dust.

Drifloon

The pied piper of Pokémon, Drifloon continues the theme of cute looking Pokémon that want nothing more than to feast on your life force. Disguised as a balloon, this pocket monster waits for a child to pick it up before leading it astray, never to be seen again.

Parasect

You might think that Pokémon got more horrific over time, but even some of the original creatures were secretly heinous. Looking at it, Paras seems to be a cross between an insect and a mushroom, which turns out to be exactly what it is, but when it evolves into Parasect, the parasitic mushroom fully takes over, meaning the insect part of the pocket monster is just a carcass, hence the dead eyes.

Yamask

The only thing scarier than getting eaten by a Pokémon would be actually being a Pokémon with all your faculties. That’s exactly what Yamask is; a human reincarnated into a Pokémon retaining all its memories. The cherry on top is the mask that it carries around is actually their face from when they were a person, and sometimes they are caught crying when looking at it.

There are many more creepy Pokémon, but these five best represent the terrifying nature of these beloved creatures. And I’m sure they won’t be the last, when we discover the Pokémon of the Alola region when Sun and Moon release on November 18th.

Tom Caswell

Enjoying the nerd renaissance one hulk smash at a time! Find me @GreatBriTom Tweeting and Instagramming!

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Tom Caswell

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