Driver: Parallel Lines – PS2 – Review

If it looks like it, walks
like it, and smells like it, the usual assumption is that it’s just that.
Diver: Parallel Lines smells like Grand Theft Auto, but the taste isn’t quite
right. It’s got the same concept, similar to the way a frozen dinner resembles
entrees from the Olive Garden. Though it may be appetizing when faced with no
other option, Lean Cuisine is hardly a substitute for the real thing.

Set in the 1970s, Parallel
Lines is about a guy with a dream and the revenge he will have when that dream
is crushed. Long story short, players get to control the main character, TK,
through two different worlds. Correction, make that the same world set in two
different eras: New York. It’s big, familiar, and has hundreds buildings that
tower over the screen. Neat concept, but in a generation where zillions of
other games share that concept, it’s the execution (not originality) that
defines the product.

With TK behind the wheel,
the game starts like a rusty old van: it moves, just not that well. The
introductory missions almost seem like a bad joke. They were designed to help
players familiarize themselves with the controls. I can respect that. However,
the controls mirror those implemented in the Grand Theft Auto series. Steal
cars by pressing the triangle button; press it again to exit. The rest is
common sense. With over 11 million copies of Vice City in gamers’ hands, you
can’t make me believe that this game’s target audience will come looking for a
tutorial. If you were clueless, so what!  It’s more fun to experiment and
learn the basics on your own.

That’s one of the areas
where Parallel Lines comes up short. I didn’t keep track of the number of
different cars on the road, but I’d say I drove at least a few dozen unique
models. Compact cars have better handling than large trucks; sports cars go
faster than the Bronco-type vehicles. Motorcycles are dangerously fast, making
them the most exciting vehicle in the game. There are a couple of surprises in
store, including one that the developer revealed months ago: when 2006
arrives, so do new vehicle aesthetics.

It’s fun to cruise around
and see how much traffic you can avoid crashing into, but eventually you’re
going to want to complete some missions. Retrieve dirty money, compete in
illegal street races, hunt down (and run over) evil men who failed to pay
their debts. The story is essentially about money, and later revenge. Both
result in unforgivable sins and bloodstained streets, but only one can get you
a shiny new upgrade for your illegal ride.

Vehicles can be tweaked,
upgraded, and repaired at various garage hot spots. These spots make
navigating the city a little less boring. The environment is big and there
isn’t much to do. Missions are far apart, and no matter how much you enjoy
cruising, its thrills are limited and will eventually disappear. You can
bypass a fair amount of the game’s boring commute by visiting the closest
garage.

If there’s one thing this
game could’ve done without it’s pedestrians. I know GTA popularized this
aspect, but there are just too many in this game. I almost hated dodging them
as much as I hated hitting them. Aside from acting as an annoying bump in the
road (your vehicle has a brief speed dip after every hit), seeing polygon
bodies fly into the air is disgusting, not exciting.

Yes, I do have a choice –
I can avoid hitting them at all costs. The point of a game like this, however,
is to complete each mission as quickly and as lethally as possible.
Nonetheless, I’d rather save the body bags for my adversaries.

Moral issues aside,
Parallel Lines experiments with the idea of realistic police officers. Take a
look around the city. Do you see any cops? If not, steal a car or two. Cause
an accident. Shoot a thug. Do whatever you please! The golden police rule is
this: if we don’t see it, it didn’t happen.

However, if they should
see you make the slightest mistake, all bets are off. They’ll sound their
sirens and fight to take you in.

Just how picky are these
cops? They don’t like speeding. They don’t like it if you bump into other
drivers while changing lanes. They don’t want you to run red lights, to drive
on the curb, or to perform any dangerous maneuvers. It sounds rough and it
probably would have been had the developers not included two wanted meters.

One is for violations
while behind the wheel of a motor vehicle; the other is for violations they
personally see you commit. If you steal a car without being seen, the cops
will target the vehicle, not you. Thus you can ditch the ride, steal another
one (when the coast is clear) and drive away like nothing happened. The police
will stay attached to that vehicle — and any other you’re seen committing
crimes in — as long as TK himself stays hidden.

Interestingly, if TK is
seen committing a crime, you can avoid police detection by stealing another
vehicle. You have to make sure the cops are nowhere in sight while doing it,
and if successful, you can drive away unnoticed.

I gotta give Parallel
Lines credit for this idea. It’s easy to get a police officer’s attention, and
with this feature you have multiple ways of dealing with that problem. I like
GTA’s wanted meter, but this dual system is much more flexible. It lets you be
a sneakier, slimier scumbag – just like real criminals.

Review Scoring Details for Driver: Parallel Lines

Gameplay: 6.5
Parallel
with Grand Theft Auto? Not quite. Driver: Parallel Lines’s flawed controls,
drab environments, and a lack of interesting side quests make cruising the
streets less fun than cruising real streets. In real life you have to
obey the law. Oh wait, you have to do that in this game too. Am I missing
something? I can run over pedestrians as long as a cop doesn’t witness it, but
oh boy if I speed when tracking a perp – sound the alarms ‘cause I’m in
trouble.

Graphics: 5
Somebody beat up
my car. And the buildings, the pavement, and the pale blue sky. Driver:
Parallel Lines is rather ugly for a game that follows so closely in GTA’s
footsteps. First I saw the characters, which looked boring to say the least.
Then I noticed the buildings, which also looked boring and were devoid of
detailed textures. Third, I saw the result of a serious collision.

I could’ve forgiven the
lack of realistic metal crumples, broken windshields, and a visibly
deteriorating body six years ago. Back then I hadn’t played Grand Theft Auto 3
yet, nor had I played NASCAR Thunder. Driver: Parallel Lines’ attempt at
creating these effects is laughable. The way the vehicles fall apart is not
realistic nor cool. The pieces look as though they were separate from the
start, as opposed to a whole car that was welded together. There are worse
looking games in the bargain bin, you can count on that. But why a game on
this level, with this much hype, and this much potential should look so dated
– it doesn’t make any sense.

Sound: 6.5
70s music is an
acquired taste. I guess that’s true of any type of music, but I’m just not
feeling the love for Parallel Lines’ soundtrack. The modern music is okay, if
not a little too common for today’s video games.

Difficulty: Easy/Medium
Nowhere near the
challenge of the series Parallel Lines borrows its material from, Grand Theft
Auto. There are cheap and frustrating moments, and times when you’ll wish you
were invisible to avoid another inevitable police encounter. I suppose the
frequent police chases were created to fill in the gaps and provide excitement
during the long and boring drives in between missions. It’s too bad it didn’t
work.

Concept: 6.5
The idea of two
wanted meters is solid, respectable, and should be adapted by other adult
driving games. The lack of missions, copycat gameplay, GTA controls and other
unoriginal features are, however, unacceptable.

Overall: 6.5
Driver: Parallel
Lines shows up on gamers’ doorsteps as a Grand Theft Auto wannabe. If the game
kicked as much butt as GTA, who could complain? Like most who have dared to
take on the king, this game failed. There were a few moments of intensity, and
a few minutes of excitement, but it’s not what it should be. I’m hoping they
can get it right next time, but if “getting it right” just means another GTA
clone, I’ll pass. This series needs to have more than one original feature if
it wants to survive.