Somewhere in
the world, a gamer is playing NFL Tour and loving every minute of it. He’s
immersed in the addictive gameplay, engrossed by the knockout thrills, and
overwhelmed by the over-the-top moves that can’t be found in NFL Blitz or the
ill-fated (and barely remembered) NFL Xtreme. He appreciates the catchy, upbeat
music but not the commentary, which is too annoying for anyone with ears to
enjoy.
In between
skirmishes with friends, he impatiently waits for the next time he’ll get to
sack his favorite opponents. He’s in Heaven. He never wants to leave his
PlayStation 3 again…
Because he,
unlike the rest of us, never played NFL Street.
If he had,
he would have likely ended up in one of the two categories that separate most
NFL Street players: die-hard fan and no fan at all. I fit into the former
category. Since the game’s launch a few years ago, I haven’t gone a single
Thanksgiving without playing NFL Street. It’s what we (my cousin and I) love to
do. We look forward to it, and spent a great deal of time playing the original
NFL Street this past Christmas Eve. We play the sequels frequently, but the
first one is our favorite.
On a next-gen
console, NFL Street could be phenomenal. But instead of making the jump to PS3
and Xbox 360 as NBA Street did last year, and as FIFA Street will do in 2008,
the NFL Street series has been axed in favor of NFL Tour. The change doesn’t
make much sense, especially when you play it for the first time and realize that
it is exactly the same as NFL Street – minus almost everything you loved about
that game.
Incomplete Pass
From the
start, NFL Tour feels somewhat familiar. It has a few of NFL Street’s qualities,
like wall jumps and a jerky, arcade-style run. But it doesn’t look or feel quite
right on PlayStation 3. When entering a next-gen game for the first time, you
expect to be awed and inspired. You expect the game to have at least a few of
those features only found on PS3 and Xbox 360 – superior controls, surreal
graphics, a more immersive experience, and so on.
Unlike its
Street predecessors, Tour doesn’t deliver on any of those expectations. If the
controls were the same as they are on PS2’s Street games, players would find a
moderately acceptable – if not intensely underwhelming – experience. But Tour
isn’t merely a port of old content – it’s a severe downgrade. The stellar
GameBreaker feature is gone. The cool, street-themed environments have been
exchanged for a bunch of overly bright stadiums that look exactly alike. The
point-earning style system, an EA BIG Sports staple, has also been removed.
These features have been sacrificed for… For what, exactly? The game makes no
explanation for why they are absent. Sure, it’s a “new” series. But where is the
new content?
Tour’s hype
points sound great on a box: “Arcade action featuring revolutionary reversal
system,” says the box. “Tour the country battling the NFL’s elite” and
“Simplified controls for any NFL fan.”
That
“revolutionary” system is a button-timing and button-mashing mechanic that was
done 10 years ago in NFL Blitz. Rather than work around your opponents, players
can now charge into them head-on. This is cool but loses steam quickly. If
you’re being tackled, jam on the X button to break free. If another opponent
approaches, jam some more. Do it repeatedly until you score a touchdown. There
are tackles that can’t be reversed, but you’ll break away most of the time. On
defense, one of the easiest tackles is a far jump that aims for your opponents’
foot. No joke. If I jumped on his back, the reversal system would allow him to
break free. But if I hit his foot, he’s usually screwed. Lame.
The tour to
battle “NFL’s elite” is nothing more than a bare-bones season mode. There are a
few differences (like having to win a game in three minutes), but the outcome is
the same.
And those
“simplified” controls don’t do anything to increase the game’s reach to the
mainstream. If anything, they hurt it. Rather than having a separate button for
each player (as in Street – it’s available in Tour but not by default), you have
just one button: X. You switch players by pressing the circle button. Though I
wouldn’t say this control style makes the game harder, it certainly doesn’t make
it simpler.
Tour’s
soundtrack is pretty good but you may never know it. Why? Because the announcers
won’t shut up. They make fun of the fact that game announcers are repetitive
and, in a lousy attempt to be funny, repeat their lines several times over. Bits
and pieces of music are drowned out by their tired, poorly written and poorly
voiced one-liners, which shouldn’t have been said more than once. The only way
you’ll enjoy the music is by listening to it from the options menu. But isn’t
that what iTunes is for?
Lights.
Camera. Where’s the action?
Conversion Failed
You can’t
rewrite history. You can’t make us forget about everything that NFL Street
achieved. Every year, my old sports games collect dust. They lose all their
value the second the next one is released. Street, however, keeps on rocking the
gridiron. NFL Tour had the opportunity to do the same – to be a groundbreaking,
unforgettable classic. But it missed the kickoff, losing all hope for a
touchdown.
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Gameplay: 4.7
The shift from
PS2 to PS3 was not successful. Rather than next-gen-specific gameplay mechanics
and PS3-caliber graphics, NFL Tour is a reduced version of NFL Street.
Graphics:
3.0
A slightly
greater amount of player detail doesn’t make a game next-gen.
Sound: 1.0
I can’t remember
the last time I turned to my TV speaker and said, “Shut up!”
Difficulty: Easy
In addition to
the removal of NFL Street’s best features, NFL Tour also removes that game’s
impressive difficulty.
Concept: 1.0
Sequels are cool.
Spin-offs are fun. Upgraded ports can serve a purpose as well. NFL Tour is not a
sequel, a spin-off, or an upgraded port. It’s the opposite of an upgrade, which
is a total loss for everyone. NFL Street’s content is already made – why not
port it over to this half-baked port?
Multiplayer: 4.0
Two online, four
offline. Those numbers would be disappointing if the game was on par with NFL
Street. As it stands, you’re not likely to care either way.
Overall: 4.5
I hear the theme
from Gilligan’s Island. I don’t know where it’s coming from, but the words are
distinct – “A three-hour tour. A three-hour tour.” Once those hours have passed,
you’ll be glad you’re not trapped on an island with this game.
