Not all
games can be great. It’s hard to deal with, but is a generally accepted side
effect of games, movies, music, and any other entertainment medium.
Over the
years we all have come to expect a certain something from certain games. Some
are deemed unappealing before they ever hit the streets because they have bad
graphics or an unorthodox premise. Others are praised from the day they’re
announced because of the developer’s name or studio attached, or because of
its exceptional visuals.
Sequels –
they are the most demanded, and the most demanding. Any time a great game is
released, we start thinking of the future. That’s why it is with great
disappointment that I have to review SpongeBob SquarePants: Creature from the
Krusty Krab with anything less than praise. Because I know that if the game
lets me down, it will let down other fans as well.
Multiplicity or Simplicity?
All is well
in the land of Bikini Bottom until somebody starts dreaming. First it’s
SpongeBob, the one you’d expect to be controlling. SpongeBob goes a little
crazy, fires up a diesel-powered go-kart, and proceeds to drive down a linear
path of box destruction and psychedelic visuals. The sky does some interesting
things, sporting waves of multi-colored fire. It’s the kind of thing only a
Bob made of sponge could envision.
Green boxes
block your way to victory. It’s best to avoid them as much as possible. But if
you can’t, you’ll soon discover that it’s not much of a problem. The race is
timed, but it’s not really much of a race – not yet at least. There are no
opponents to ward off, and no other karts to beat to the finish line. It’s
just a simple, narrow drive with green boxes and turbo arrows that give
SpongeBob a speed boost.
Take enough
damage and SpongeBob’s kart will slow down temporarily. This happened once out
of carelessness. I started to lose interest as soon as I realized that there
wasn’t much of a challenge involved. Had I been playing at full capacity, it’s
doubtful that I would have slowed down. But even with that one slowdown, I was
able to recover and cross the finish line long before my time was up.
Next up I
learned that SpongeBob’s vehicle had been destroyed. Now he had to move on
foot, collect a few parts to fix the vehicle, and get back in the race.
Finally some classic SpongeBob gameplay!
…Not
quite. The first level was just as linear as the course. Every path was laid
out with too much clarity. The introductory movie sequence could be skipped,
but all others after that are considered important to the progress of the game
and cannot be bypassed. They tell you exactly where to go, and exactly what to
do.
If you’ve
played the other SpongeBob games – which is very likely if you’re interested
in Krusty Krab – then you don’t need the game’s directions. You don’t need to
be told that there’s a crate in the middle of the room, and that ramming into
it will cause it move to forward, triggering an important event. Come ‘on: if
there’s a crate – just one – in any room, I think it’s safe to say that
most gamers, young or old, will be able to figure out that they need to do
something with it.
I collect
the pieces, repair my kart (done automatically in between more
cutscenes), and get back on the course. Another race ensues. I win, and it’s
back to the scavenger hunt. This goes on for a few more times before the
player will gain control of Patrick.
The
Square Button
Don’t know
where the square button is on your PlayStation 2 controller? Well gamers, you
had better go and find it. For the next 30 minutes, it is the only button
you’re going to need. Occasional stops at "x" and "triangle" will be made, but
then it’s back to square-mashing.
Like
SpongeBob’s adventure, Patrick has to go on a scavenger hunt. He has different
reasons, none of which are funny or interesting. It has something to do with
the retrieval of an Elvis impersonator’s costume — I can tell you that. But
the rest? It has slipped my mind.
This is the
complete opposite of Battle for Bikini Bottom, whose dialogue had me laughing
for hours.
Amidst his
item-hunting, Patrick will run into numerous paper-thin enemies. They come out
of posters on the wall, and they look just like Patrick. You’ll have to sit
through a cutscene every time an enemy appears, every time they’re defeated,
every time a switch is activated, and every time you enter a new room. In
other words, your gameplay experience is going to be interrupted a lot.
The first
several batches of enemies take just one punch to defeat. This means that,
within a 60 second timeframe, you could defeat two batches, watch three or
four cutscenes, and still have time to wonder if anything exciting was going
to happen.
Boxes must
be destroyed, items need to be collected, and more switches will have to be
pushed.
To the
game’s credit, the controls are pretty smooth and reliable. The camera is a
little stiff at times, and will get caught behind a wall every now and then.
But as far as the technology goes, Krusty Krab is more than acceptable.
The gameplay,
however, is much too repetitive to enjoy. I didn’t have much fun
button-mashing the first 20 enemies – why would I have fun button-mashing
another 50? Another 100+?
Later levels
offer other types of gameplay – including a plankton chase – all of which are
repetitive in their own way.
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Gameplay: 5.0
A mix of
simplicity and monotony. Creature from the Krusty Krab is a far cry from the
last game, and an even further departure from the first two – both of which
still stand as some of the best action/adventures created for PlayStation 2.
Krusty Krab puts too much of its focus on button-mashing, and unnecessary,
un-playable story interruptions. Whereas the other SpongeBob games featured
hilarious cutscenes that added to the experience, these serve as a guide to
carry you every step of the way. The scenes are completely unnecessary, and
not at all entertaining.
Graphics: 7.5
Trippy backdrops
and a cel-shaded Patrick keep Krusty Krab from falling below PS2 standards.
Sound: 5.0
The music is
decent, but the annoying, constantly repeated voice-overs and lines of self
praise are more than anyone’s ears should have to endure.
Difficulty: Easy
It’s SpongeBob
for dummies. If there was a smidgen of challenge to be found it’s doubtful
that anyone would know it. Krusty Krab shows you everything you need to
do, repeatedly, forcing anyone but the most inexperienced players to
shout at their TV, “I got it already!”
Concept: 6.0
On the outside,
Creature from the Krusty Krab appears to have more variety than the other
SpongeBob games. Each world has its own play style – at least that’s the way
it appears. In reality, you’ll spend hours hammering the square button
(a reference to SpongeBob’s last name? Nah…). Collect an item, press the
square button to beat the enemies that follow, and then sit through a boring
cutscene that should’ve been cut from the game. That’s the style of Krusty
Krab, plus a few mini-games that do nothing to enhance the tiring experience.
Overall: 5.0
The fact of the
matter is, Krusty Krab comes from a series that has prided itself on being a
spectacular alternative to the mascot game leaders. For it to be anything less
now – for it to be so repetitive, so easy, and so filled with useless
interruptions – is a colossal disappointment.
