Wheelman – 360 – Review

In a world where Grand Theft
Auto, Saints Row and Crackdown showcase incredibly open world
environments, there are many copy cats that can only dream of putting forth
similar quality. Midway’s – and now Ubisoft’s – Wheelman is one of those
pretenders with over-the-top action, disappointing graphics and below average
controls. Let’s dig deep and discover the drawbacks of Wheelman, a video
game that looks and plays as if it was released six months too early.

The first thing
you’ll notice when you start your journey through Wheelman – outside of
the obvious inclusion of former A-lister Vin Diesel – are the sub par graphics
that don’t utilize the Unreal 3.0 engine. With the power of the Unreal 3.0
engine, you’d think that the developers would’ve taken their time to create a
gorgeous looking title, but instead the end results are caricatures that are
horrendous to the bitter. The characters in the game all look weathered and old
with wrinkles due to the poorly implemented lighting. There’s just too much
lighting and it all comes off as unnatural. Poor Vin Diesel, he hasn’t looked
this bad since his film xXx.

Wheelman doesn’t employ
an in-depth storyline to hold your interest beyond the first few missions.
Diesel plays as Milo, a smooth talking driver for criminals and other randoms
who just need a quick escape from whoever they are running from (usually the
police). The basic concept is chasing cars, shooting cars, and being chased by
cars; yes, there isn’t much diversity beyond the first few levels of gameplay
where you experience everything the game has to offer. You might enjoy the
occasional on-foot sections where you can shoot at your enemies in third-person,
but in the end, the gameplay isn’t that satisfying by any means. Running around
on your foot just isn’t exactly as superb as it was in GTA or Saints
Row, but it didn’t have to be since it’s a driving-based game at the end of
the day because there’s not nearly enough to do on foot. You’ll end up
scratching your head wondering if Wheelman is paying homage to old arcade
titles where they usually involved around mindless action without worrying about
the storyline. Or quite possibly, you might find yourself wondering if it was
shipped to retailers uncompleted.

When driving,
there are a few quirks to take advantage of, but once again, there’s not much to
keep you coming back. When you are driving, you can use the right thumbstick to
smash into your enemies with your vehicles. Think of this as body checking in
hockey, pressing left or right on the stick will slam your enemies into the wall
with your own vehicle. This highly exaggerated action may entertain younger
generations, but after awhile, you’ll grow bored of the game slowing down to see
a car barrel roll down the road and explode into a hundreds of pieces.

In addition, if exploding cars
aren’t enough to tickle your fancy then maybe leaping from car to car at high
speeds is your type of thing. Yes, that’s right; you can leap forward twenty to
thirty feet and jack a neighboring car without any realism attached to the
gameplay. There’s even the ability to spin your car around and enter into a
slow-mo/bullet-time mode where you can fire at your opponents with precision.
It’s a highly predictable game with not much originality provided, so just be
warned that Wheelman is a title without much uniqueness.

So what does Wheelman
offer? There’s voice-acting by Vin Diesel himself but sadly the rest of the
voice-acting is wooden and overly annoying. Your passengers will often yell and
command you to make impossible the possible when driving, and you’ll wonder “why
doesn’t Milo give them a little taste of what’s on his mind?” The soundtrack at
least somewhat makes up for the lack of believable voice-acting. A majority of
the genres of music, from hip-hop to dance music, are covered so that shouldn’t
be an issue for gamers. The main problem that will stand out from the technical
department of Wheelman revolves around the disappointing graphics – you
won’t be able to overlook the poor visual presentation.

Midway needed to provide
Wheelman another six months of development, with concentration on improving
the graphics for this title to look anywhere near finished. It’s a technical
mess without an ounce of salvation. Its replay value is little to none; once you
are finished with the storyline, there are no incentives to return to the game.
The best advice is to play the demo and if that catches your interest, then
proceed to a weekend rental because that’s all the title is worth.

Gameplay: 5.5
If driving titles are up your
alley, then there should be a subtle attraction to Wheelman’s highly
explosive gameplay.

Graphics: 3.5
More hideous than the ugly
duckling, there’s no reason or excuse for Wheelman to look this bad.

Sound: 6.0
Often times you might want to
turn down the volume or go straight to mute as your passengers unnervingly yell
out directions to Milo without much of a response from Diesel himself.

Difficulty: Easy

Concept: 5.0
Sure, you might give the
developers a hand when it comes to several “cool” concepts of slamming enemies
into the wall with your car or leaping from car to car, but you’ll grow tired of
the over-the-top action sooner rather than later.

Overall: 5.2
Wheelman has to be the
year’s most disappointing title so far. Before Wheelman’s release, Diesel
had the chance to star in two bona fide hits in a matter of one month as The
Chronicles of Riddick: Assault on Dark Athena releases at the start of
April. Now, with Wheelman as a major letdown, he only has one left in his
queue for 2009 to put his name back in the limelight.