Yes, the hit Nickelodeon
show stars Jamie Spears, the spitting image of 16-year-old Brittney, and while
the show is more cutting edge than your average tweener show (Suite Life,
Hannah Montana, etc.) with its plot devices more realistic than others, the
game is about as flat as a piece of paper. Which is actually a good way to
describe everything else about this title.
Yes, the game revolves
around our heroine "Zoey;" her and her friends want to do a documentary film
about the local national park. Being the characters are slightly rebellious
and all the antics they get into on the show, it may have been a good plot
device to keep up with the zaniness. Nope, even though you are supposed to be
ditching class to go film outdoors, you still have to convince teachers you
are on the up and up while collecting the various items you will need to get
the film made.
If I have made this game
even the slightest bit interesting, then I am way off my mark. Going to my 13-year-old niece for some much needed guidance on everything Zoey, I found out
that the game really doesn’t do the TV show, or the license, justice. Instead
of a cleverly written, slightly street-smart title, we got a game involving
the always boring "go fetch item X and bring it to character Z." Yes, the
entire game is based on this premise, with the exception of the occasional
mini-game (which don’t last nearly long enough) you will run around a school
that has no likeness to the school in the TV show, trying to bring an item to
a character that you have no idea where they are at. Literally, you have a
finite amount of time to try and find a character that you have no idea where
they are at. A map of the school is available, but I don’t know why the
developers bothered, since it tells you nothing of importance. In some games
the map tells you where to go; in this one, it tells you where the lunchroom
is, even though you never need to know that.
The controls are about as
bad as a DS game gets. While you run around you use the D-pad instead of the
stylus and you will find that Zoey is as clumsy as a one-legged mule walking
down the Grand Canyon with a pair of WWE wrestlers fighting on its back. Yes,
the controls stink. Zoey runs into everything and fortunately for us, this game
has nothing to do with stealth, because there is just no way you could get it
done. The only redeeming point is the mini-games
that, while not very entertaining to play, provide some sort of control to
an otherwise displaced mess.
Graphically Zoey looks
nothing like the real character in the show. A giant bobble-headed blonde with
all the appearance of a 3rd grader. Even the locations are bland
and uninspired, this is a very poor-looking game with poor controls, even the
sound is below average. The developers must have gotten a deal on water
sounds, since that is the dominant noise in the game. A light fluffy
background music puffs throughout the game, but then the sound effects of
various items blow it away. There is no sense of equality in the noise
distribution.
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Gameplay: 4.0
It controls poorly and the
developers introduce no thought of an original idea. The outside chance of a
person learning anything form Zoey’s research on the national forest and the
native Americans who lived there, is instantly negated by poor gameplay.
Graphics: 3.0
If that’s Zoey, then she
clearly has developed a thyroid problem, poor girl.
Sound: 1.6
Water, water everywhere, and
not a drop to drink.
Difficulty: Easy/Medium
Only made more difficult by
the complete absence of any sort of direction or instruction on who and where
the item you are supposed to deliver, is located.
Concept: 3.0
A
poor use of the license.
Overall: 2.8
I can only beat a game up so
much, after reviewing it, I gave it to my niece and she looked at me like I
had just ran over her dog.
